For the next six months the family relationship was strained. Guinevere had tricked her husband into making her pregnant and Abhijeet felt betrayed by her dishonesty with him. If they couldn’t trust one another, who could they trust? So much time had passed already that he barely remembered his brief affair with Christy Stratton. They never spoke any more and he thought he probably wouldn’t even recognize her if she walked down the street. In fact, he was finding that he had less and less interest in Christy, though occasionally another woman would catch his eye. What was important to him now was his daughter and he was beginning to realize he was willing to risk anything to strengthen their bond.
Abhijeet thought frequently about leaving the home to Guinevere and finding a place of his own where he would have the freedom to do the things he wanted to do and to pursue his own interests. But he also realized that his leaving would hurt Morgaine, and so he continued to muddle through as best he could. He was hardly attentive to Guinevere during her pregnancy and she didn’t ask him to be. Truthfully the couple rarely spoke anymore and seemed to have little interest in one another. What had once been had died down significantly in the meantime and both were aware that if things didn’t improve they were going to find themselves pursuing other ‘interests.’
Abhijeet had a lot of thinking to do. Guinevere was nearly due with their second child when one day he looked at Morgaine and realized something important: He loved his family more than anything he had ever known! He’d never wanted children — they just weren’t part of the package he was interested in, much to the dismay of his parents. What he wanted was women — lots of women — and a job as a Celebrity Chef. Those had always been the things that were important to him.
Perhaps his struggles were because he’d decided it was a mistake to marry Guinevere the day they tied the knot and not because of Guinevere herself or because of the essence of their marriage. Maybe it wasn’t her fault but his. Whatever the case he realized when he looked on Morgaine’s beautiful features, so much like his own… He loved his daughter, and he loved being a father!
Alarmed, he stood up from where he had been sitting in the living room, lost in his own thoughts, and darted for the bedroom to tell Guinevere what he had discovered. He was outside the bedroom in the hall when he heard the first of the ear-piercing screams. Startled, he stopped dead in his tracks. What was going on? Why was his wife screaming? Suddenly worried, he threw the door open and rushed to her side only to realize that her screams of pain were caused by the onset of her labor.
“I’ll boil some water!” he cried, remembering what he’d seen in TV movies.
“NO!” Guin immediately admonished in a harsh, pain-filled tone. “Call Dr. Portland. He knows what to do!”
Abhijeet rushed for the phone and made the necessary call before returning to his wife hurredly. “He says he’s on his way. What do you need me to do?!”
“I need you to leave me alone and wait for Dr. Porland!” Guinevere barked at her husband, clearly angered by his sudden presence after so long. Shocked, Abhijeet could only stand there for a moment, staring at his laboring wife, before shrugging his shoulders and leaving the room, deeply hurt. He’d made an effort to be there and Guin had refused him. What the next step was he couldn’t be sure….
The second birth was much shorter than the first and after only five hours Abhijeet heard a cry coming from the bedroom. He continued to pace the hall anxiously, unsure of whether he should go in to see his newborn or if he should wait until he was invited. His parents had picked Morgaine up and had agreed to babysit her until everything at home had been taken care of, and he was therefore left to focus on his wife, their new child, and their failing marriage.
It was nearly an hour before Dr. Portland came out of the bedroom. “Guinevere’s fine,” he told the anxious husband. “And you have a beautiful baby girl. Your wife has named her Therese. But she doesn’t want to see you right now, Mr. Cornwell. So I ask that you please give your wife her space until she is ready to come to you. For now, I have to be going.”
It was no comfort to the young man who had so recently made a serious realization. He wanted to see his wife and he wanted to see his new daughter. He watched in dismay as the doctor left him alone with no conciliation and nowhere to turn. Finally he decided that he would go to collect Morgaine and speak with his mother then. Perhaps she could advise him on what to do with his failing marriage.
At the Depiesse household everything seemed frighteningly normal. Morgaine was sat at the supper table where he and Guinevere had shared meals so many times before, eating her evening meal. She looked up and smiled at her father but was immediately able to detect the tension on his face. “Daddy, what’s wrong?” she asked, startled.
Lovingly Abhijeet forced a smile. “It’s nothing sweetheart. Why don’t you go outside and play while I talk to Gramma and Grandpa? That’s a good girl,” he smiled as she rushed outside to play. Truly, Morgaine was his pride and joy, and he loved the child dearly and inexplicably. For as long as he lived, he vowed he would do everything he could to protect her.
Barabara Depiesse came out of the kitchen, surprised to see her son standing in the dining room with a worried expression on his face. “What is it, honey?” she asked, alarmed. “Is something wrong? Is the baby okay? Is Guin okay?”
Abhijeet nodded and sank into one of the dining room chairs, clearly distraught. “They’re fine, Mom,” he said, his voice hoarse. “It’s me that has the problem.”
Over the course of the next hour Abhijeet described the problems in his marriage to his mother, who listened with an attentive ear. He explained about how he had briefly been taken with Christy Stratton and had an affair with her, only to have things ended prematurely. He told her about how he felt about other women and how he felt that his marriage was tying him down when he wasn’t ready to be tied down. He told her about Guin tricking him into making her pregnant and he told her about his feelings for Morgaine and his realizations of that afternoon.
After a long time his mother spoke. “It seems to me that you think you made a mistake when you married Guinevere, sweetheart. Your father and I were curious about your choice even when you made it, but we respected you enough to keep our feelings to ourselves. We know how you can be around girls — you were always like that — and we didn’t think you were ready to settle down. But you said you were and we had to respect that, Abhijeet.” She thought for a moment before continuing with her speech. “I don’t have any advice for you except to say that you need to put your daughters first now. Whatever else may be happening in your relationship with Guin, your daughters need to come first, for both of you. How do you think Morgaine would feel if you were to leave her and her mother?”
“Abandoned,” Abhijeet answered honestly, looking out the window to watch his little girl playing with another child from the neighborhood. “I don’t want to do that to her. But I don’t know that there is any alternative. If Guin and I aren’t happy, will she be happy?”
“Children don’t like to see their parents fight, Abhijeet. Now I’m sure, knowing both you and Guin as I do, that you’ve kept this away from Morgaine. But how long can you keep that up? You need to make the choice to stay or go, but whichever you choose, you are going to have to do with everything that’s in you!”
It was a lot to consider, and consider it Abhijeet would. Satisfied that he had more to think about now than ever before, he went into the yard and called Morgaine to go home. Together they walked towards their own house a few blocks away in silence. Morgaine could sense her father’s tension and Abhijeet had too much to think about to notice his daughter’s discomfort. Ultimately he was going to need to make a choice that would hopefully make both of his daughters happier.
When father and daughter arrived home, Abhijeet announced that it was bedtime for Morgaine. He needed to talk to Guinevere, even if she didn’t want to see him at that moment. There were too many things they needed to discuss, too many decisions that had to be made between them. For the first time he was realizing that their relationship was a joint responsibility, as was their parenting. He couldn’t let this go on for any longer.
“But I want to see the baby!” Morgaine announced sulkily.
“You can see her tomorrow, sweetheart,” Abhijeet announced as he tucked his older daughter into bed. “I promise.” He kissed her goodnight and headed into the bedroom where he knew both mother and baby would be asleep.
It was Guinevere he went to first, kissing her gently on her sleeping forehead. Watching her like that, he knew that he loved her as much as he had the day he first laid eyes on her. She looked like an elvin angel when she slept and it brought tears to his eyes to think that he had forgotten what it was like to be in love with such a wonderful woman. Had he lost her love forever? he wondered. With a sigh, he turned from his bed and looked towards the crib where Morgaine had once slept and where Therese now snored peacefully.
He still hadn’t welcomed his second daughter into the world and without another sound, he crept to her crib and gazed down upon her. She was a beautiful child, just like her sister, and for a brief moment a genuine smile lit the man’s face. Perhaps she was worth the trickery in the end… Maybe it would all be worth it in the end. Quietly he bent down to place a gentle kiss on his new daughter’s forehead and then straightened again.
As he turned back to the bed, he noticed that Guinevere was now sitting up in bed, watching him. For a moment their eyes met and locked, angry sparks flashing in the deep green of Guin’s eyes and sadness reflecting in Abhijeet’s own orbs. Finally he spoke. “I know you don’t want to talk to me right now, but there are some things we need to discuss. I’m going to make some supper — I’m sure you’re hungry — and then I think we should talk about what needs to happen for our family and for our girls.”
He didn’t wait for her response but instead slipped out of the room silently and went into the kitchen to prepare their meal.
Abhijeet had already begun eating when Guinevere arrived at the table. With a sneer of scorn for her husband, she picked up a plate and sat down, eating off her lap instead of eating the plate that he had prepared for her. He sighed softly and shook his head, waiting for the right moment, perhaps when she had calmed down a bit. Finally he spoke.
“I’ve had cause to do a lot of thinking in the last few days,” he said after he had cleared his voice and braced himself for her possible reaction. “I should have been doing a lot of thinking all along, but I’m afraid that I just didn’t realize how bad things had gotten between us. I know you haven’t been happy and truthfully neither have I. I feel like you tricked me into getting you pregnant with Therese and I don’t like being tricked, Guin. Why didn’t you just talk to me about how you felt?”
Guinevere was still angry and it showed on her face. She glared at him for a long time before she answered his question. “I didn’t think you wanted to talk about the way things were in our relationship. I didn’t think you cared about how I felt and what I wanted. It’s always been about you and your dreams, Abhijeet. You never left much room for me!”
Abhijeet just nodded, trying to remain understanding of his wife’s feelings. “You’re right, Guin. I didn’t. And I’m sorry about that. It’s time that we made a change and I want that change to happen now.” He watched her for a few moments, trying to judge her reaction, and then sighed with a small nod of his head. Finally she put her plate down and he reached for her hands, taking them in his own and looking directly into her green eyes. “If you won’t do this for me, do it for the girls, Guin. Please…”
Guin jerked her hands away and turned her head away from her husband. “I want you to leave, Abhijeet,” she said in a low voice. “I want you to leave now.”
Abhijeet grunted, then sighed. Obviously he wasn’t getting through to her. “Fine,” he said after a moment. “But I’m taking the kids with me.”
Guinevere turned on him in an instant, flaring up angrily so that Morgaine stirred in her bed and Therese began to cry in her crib. “No you won’t! I won’t let you take my children!”
It was the reaction that Abhijeet had hoped for, the in that he needed. “Then let’s make it work, Guin,” he said as he stood up from his chair. “Let’s both put the effort into this relationship and make it work for the girls. Think about it.”
Abhijeet walked away then and back into the bedroom, leaving his wife with her thoughts. Therese was crying and Abhijeet intended to take care of her. He hadn’t had much time to spend with his younger daughter yet and he wanted that time, wanted to develop that bond. She was hungry and her diaper needed changing, and Abhijeet took care of the baby’s needs, talking to her the entire time. He and Morgaine had grown very close since the problems with Guinevere had become so intense and she had become the light of his life. He wanted it to be the same with Therese, if it was possible. Besides, he knew that if there was any way he could get to the mother, it would be through the children.
Besides, there was no greater bond than between parent and child, and Abhijeet was finally beginning to understand that, and further, to understand Guinevere’s desire to have a family. As he held little Therese in his arms he began to realize that perhaps he, too, would like to have the family that Guinevere desired, especially if it made her happy. He would have to think about it, and think about it he would. If their marriage could be saved, he couldn’t wait to continue their lives together!
It would be several weeks before Guinevere and Abhijeet spoke again. They shared a bed and meals, took care of their daughters together and went to work, but they barely spoke and certainly neither of them brought up the talk they’d had the night that Therese was born. Abhijeet ached to talk about it with his wife but she kept her distance from him and could often be found giving him a steely, angry stare. It hurt him deeply to know that she felt such anger for him, but he tried to keep his feelings to himself and put everything he had into both his jobs: Working as a Fast Food Manager and his job as a father to his two girls. He hated the fast food industry and he longed to get a promotion. He knew that Guinevere, too, hoped that he would earn a promotion and along with it a higher salary, but he also knew he had to prove to her that he wanted to be a father and a husband.
Both children seemed to enjoy their time with Abhijeet and he was forming a strong bond with Therese already. He played with Morgaine every chance he got and talked to her about everything, the way he could remember sitting down with his mother when he was a child. It reminded him of his own past and he wondered once in awhile how difficult it must have been for Guinevere, growing up without parents of her own. He was beginning to understand her desires for a family and what fueled them, and with those realizations came guilt that he hadn’t been able to provide for her what she had so wanted.
But no matter how hard Abhijeet struggled to keep the tension in the family away from Morgaine, Guinevere was able to sabotage it by not speaking to him and allowing the tension to become so thick in the house that it could be cut with a knife. Although she hadn’t yet reached her sixth birthday, Morgaine was all too aware of what was going on in her house and it made her sad. Though she was too young to understand the nature of the problems with which her parents struggled, she knew that there were problems and she wanted to do what she could to help them. She’d begun to spend as much time thinking about what was going on in her family as her parents did, and it was a heavy burden for the five year-old to bear.
Therese was nine months old when Morgaine finally decided that she could handle it no more and had to talk to her mother about the problems that she saw in their family. It hurt her to know that her parents were hurting and she didn’t know what was making them so angry and upset all the time. She was once again on the swings when her mother came out to push her and have some quiet time before bed with her daughter. Sensitive, Morgaine tried to think of a good way to broach the topic, and finally she decided to talk about Therese.
“I remember when Therese was born, Momma,” she said as she swung. Guinevere was silent so the child continued. “Daddy took me to Gramma’s and then we came back later on and he wouldn’t let me see you or the baby… And I heard you yelling later on,” she said finally, bringing up what was really important. “Why were you yelling, Momma? Why are you and Daddy mad at one another?”
Guinevere had to think for a moment about how to explain things to her daughter. She hadn’t realized just how much the tension between Abhijeet and her had been affecting their children. She didn’t want to have to talk about it with Morgaine. In fact, she should talk with Abhijeet about it, but she didn’t want to speak to him either. It was a difficult situation!
“You heard us huh?” she said finally. “I’m sorry about that baby, really I am. Daddy and I just have some things we need to work through. It will be alright, you’ll see.”
She was in no way sure it was true, but it seemed that Morgaine was satisfied with her mother’s response. That was enough for now. There was time to think, and then she’d talk things over with Abhijeet and hopefully find a resolution to their problems.
Guinevere thought a lot about her relationship with Abhijeet over the next several months. They were still like two ships passing in the night as he studied to get ajob at the next level in his career, hoping to at least become a Host at his favorite restaurant in Sim City and she worked out and took care of the children along with going to her own job as a Counter Intelligence Agent. Although it still was difficult balancing two jobs, that of a military officer and that of mother, Guinevere had noticed that Abhijeet was making more and more of an effort to help her out with the kids whenever he was home, and she noticed that his bond with both girls was improving and becoming quite touching.
Every now and then Guinevere could be caught watching Abhijeet with Morgaine or Therese, singing to them or reading books to both girls as he snuggled with them in their parents’ bed. It was a good feeling, a feeling of something that had been lost and was once again found. It was also bitter-sweet as she realized what she might have missed out on as a child. Somehow Abhijeet was warming her heart again and winning her love for the second time in their lives. Perhaps things could be saved for them. Perhaps their marriage would improve!
Therese’s first birthday was approaching and Guinevere intended to speak to her husband before then if she got a chance. They so rarely saw one another that it easily became frustrating when she wanted and needed to talk to him and to have him be part of her life again. She was almost tempted to ask him to quit his job so that they would have more time together, but she knew that would be foolish — they needed his income.
There wasn’t any time for them to talk, so for the time being Guinevere threw herself into her motherhood, focusing her attentions entirely on Morgaine and Therese. She hadn’t failed to notice that Abhijeet was doing his part with the children now too when he was home and it took some pressure off her — she was finally able to get some sleep when she needed it rather than having to change diapers every time they needed changing or always be the one to feed Therese. It left her more time for Morgaine and more time for herself and that was something for which she was grateful. Yes, her relationship with Abhijeet was improving, and she couldn’t deny that he had become a very attentive father.
Morgaine’s sixth birthday came only a few weeks before Therese’s first birthday, and with the passage of another year, Morgaine began school. Guinevere did everything she could to encourage her daughter to be a good student, and she could often be found helping the young girl with her homework. The pressure that Abhijeet was taking off her allowed for this extra special time with Morgaine and for the first time mother and daughter were developing a close relationship, the type of relationship that Morgaine had previously only had with her father. It was something that Guinevere had missed out on before, and the more she got to know her daughter, the better she knew her husband.
Morgaine spoke often of her love for her father, and it was clear that the little girl was very attached to Abhijeet. It would tear the child apart to lose her father, Guinevere realized, and it would tear Guin apart to lose any of her children. Come what may she and Abhijeet had to work things out. The girls wouldn’t be happy as long as their parents were fighting or not speaking to one another either. Their family needed to get things together for the good of everyone involved, and Guinevere was beginning to realize that it was her responsibility to make things work out for them. Abhijeet was doing his part, now it was time for her to do hers!
On Therese’s first birthday Abhijeet was once again in bed when the party began, as he had been for both of Morgaine’s birthdays. Guinevere tried to keep her disappointment in check as she put out the cake that she had baked for her younger daughter and gathered Morgaine for the celebration. The older girl clearly noticed her father’s absence but seemed to understand it as well. Her father worked late and was up early in the morning to take care of Morgaine and her sister while their mother was at work. They needed him and he needed his rest. She couldn’t blame him for not being there just because she wanted him to be, and although it hurt to think that he was missing her sister’s big day, Morgaine had become a very sensitive little lady who loved both of her parents dearly and wanted what was best for them all in the long run.
Though it was difficult to put it out of their minds that Therese’s father couldn’t be there, the party was a blast and Morgaine and Guinevere both had a great time watching the baby grow into a beautiful toddler. It was only sad that Abhijeet, who had so wanted to be present for her birth, couldn’t be there for her first birthday. As Guinevere cuddled her younger daughter to her chest, she sought understanding for her husband, although it was difficult. Yes, some part of her still loved him. After all, she wouldn’t have wanted him to be with them if she didn’t.